Two cards keep showing up in my readings – The Star and Nine of Cups! They have appeared in quite a few of my readings I read for myself, and when my grandmother read my cards. These are very positive vibe cards. They don’t show up together, but they have made their appearances separately. The first to make their appearance was The Star card.
The Star card is all about faith, optimism, and success. The Star card showed up in my March, 2015 readings. The Star card also showed up in my yearly forecast reading for myself. It showed up in the December position when normally the Four of Swords shows up for every December, indicating I would get run-down and catch a cold or will be very tired. I read the cards as an overall impression as well. The Star card indicated to me that my dreams would come true this year. I need to have more faith in myself and need to think positive for a change. Thinking positive doesn’t come naturally to me, and neither does believing in myself.
I’ve struggled with believing in myself since I was a kid. I was picked on all the time. This has traumatized me psychologically and to this day, it still bothers me. A lot of people outside of my family have run me down. They would say I was too fat and ugly, especially boys. They also said I was stupid because I have learning disabilities. This resulted to me being diagnosed with depression in my teen years, and years later as an adult, being diagnosed with NOS bipolar disorder.
Thinking positive didn’t come easily to me either. I used to be very pessimistic. I always saw the glass as half empty (these days I’m a realist, I drank the damn glass of water). I worried a lot. I worried about what the wrong people thought about me. I worried if I would ever have a boyfriend who would love me for who I was and saw the beauty within me, that I didn’t see in myself. I worried about the wrong, stupid things.
Fast forward to me in March, 2015. My biological paternal grandmother passed away. I was struggling with my faith in a higher power/God. I did a Celtic Cross reading on myself, and The Star card was the outcome. This indicated to me that my faith would be restored, somehow someway. Also, there was going to be opportunities abound if I just kept thinking positive and believed in myself. I shrugged off the reading. “Yeah right,” I thought.
It was then April, and I went on a life-changing trip to Louisiana for my paternal grandmother’s funeral. I was a nervous wreck the whole way down and the whole way coming home. However, I did something that I haven’t done in years. This was praying to God or a higher power. I prayed for safe travels, I prayed to God to help my dad heal from the loss of his mother. I prayed for a good night’s sleep. I prayed that I didn’t have a manic episode or get into a depressive episode. I prayed for clean hotel rooms. I’ve never prayed as hard as I did during my trip to Louisiana, and I never saw my prayers manifest as fast as they did when we were on the road and in Louisiana. However, I still wasn’t quite as convinced. Sure, I started to believe in God and angels once again, but I needed to know something.
I had experienced a visitation from my grandmother in my hotel room one night. She had a red-orange aura, and she appeared as her younger self and was healthy. She leaned down and kissed my dad on the cheek as if to say “goodbye” or “goodnight.” That experience stuck with me. I had to know if it was real or I was just overly tired from only getting 5 hours of sleep at night.
I contacted a medium. The medium picked up my grandmother right away. She explained that the red-orange aura was energy and that she was full of joy. She then passed on a message for me from my grandmother. The message: “Sammy’s gotta believe!”. The medium felt the message was not just about the dream I had, but also meant to believe in myself and my abilities. I also knew what the message meant. My grandmother was a very spiritual woman, who had a big belief in God. She didn’t know that I was struggling with my faith when she died. I knew that she meant I need to believe in a higher power. And from that day of the reading, my faith was restored.
I still struggle with believing in myself, but I am slowly starting to believe in myself. I am blessed to have the support of family and friends and even acquaintances who see the good in me. Now, the Star card also indicated that opportunities were right around the corner. I decided to re-open my tarot practice after taking a year off. I started writing my book Easy Tarot Spreads. And then, a wish came true: Janet Boyer, THEE Janet Boyer, who has blazed trails in the tarot community, has asked me to blog for her Thematic Tarot blog. This is where the nine of Cups comes in.
The nine of Cups is known as the wish card. Whatever you wish for, it will be granted as long as you believe that it will come true. The wish card showed up not once, but twice in my readings the same day I did them. Even though the positions they were in had completely different meanings, I knew the nine of Cups was trying to get my attention. It said “Hey you! Your dreams are going to come true! Believe and have faith!”
So I took Janet up on her offer. And here I am, blogging for Thematic Tarot and doing what I love doing – readings for others. The Star is about opportunity, believing in yourself and in goodness. The nine of Cups is about prayers being answered, wishes coming true. It is my sincere wish that my blog inspires you to believe in yourself as well and that everything you wish and hope for comes true.
You can find the Peanuts Tarot here.